A few of my favorite Self Improvement books…

Written by Lyndi. Posted in About Me, Health & Wellness, Life Coaching

If you have ever been to my house and have seen my bookshelf, you would know that I am a FREAK about finding the best self improvement books.   When I go to Barnes & Noble, I go directly to the Self Help section and I have no interest in looking in any other area of the store (my family and friends just shake their head :) )  I've always had the desire and have enjoyed the process of figuring out how to improve in different areas of my life.

My self improvement books have a wide range from learning how to raise kids, strengthen relationships, to find inner peace, live for today,  find joy in life (no matter what you have experienced) and self love.  Some would say that I'm like a Pollyanna, cause I REALLY want to have an insane amount of love, joy, peace and happiness in my life (I know... that sounds like a Christmas card) every single day and all year around.  I mean really...is that too much to ask?!?  I don't think so!  I believe that you can have this and whatever else you desire, as long as it is good in nature.  The process of how to learn to create a happy, fulfilling life is not an easy one...but one that is definitely worth it.  I have been reading these kinds of books for years and have read the same ones over and over again and I still struggle EVERY SINGLE DAY!  Whenever I have days of sadness, feeling negative or impatient, are the days that I need to read these books even more.  They have helped me pull out of deep depressing days and have guided me to my happy places of light and joy.

 

This book by Wayne Dyer is my current favorite.  I bought the book on CD and I listen to it while I'm driving around with the kids or when I am traveling.  This will inspire you to the core...it's a little deep, but if you take his words of advice, you WILL be undoubtedly successful and happy in your life.

best self improvement books

This is another one of my favorite self help books. It an amazing story about a women who had a near death experience while experiencing cancer that had spread to every part of her body and all of her organs were shut down.  She talks about her experience in heaven and her choice to come back to earth and heal.  She was cancer free within a few weeks of her near death experience.  Truly inspirational...

my favorite self help books

The Five Love Language Books are some of my all time favorites!  I love them because they help you understand why people do what they do.  In relationships trying to understand what makes your significant other tick is key...this book helps you figure that out and how to appropriately respond to them.  The five love languages are: Physical Touch, Acts of Service, Gifts, Words of Affirmation and Quality Time.  We each have 2 main love languages and that is basically how we feel love.  For example, mine are Acts of Service and Words of Affirmation.  If someone went and washed my car for me to be nice,  that shows love more to me than if they bought me something.  Don't get me wrong, I love it when people buy things for me, but the thought behind it truly means more to me than the monetary value.  Gary Chapman has released these books for relationships with a spouse, child or teenager.  He also came out a singles edition and one just for men.  Highly recommend. 

5 love languages marriage and self improvement books51x-APt-cXL._SY344_PJlook-inside-v2,TopRight,1,0_SH20_BO1,204,203,200_51T1xjGCRGL._SY344_PJlook-inside-v2,TopRight,1,0_SH20_BO1,204,203,200_41rcmBDj20L._SY344_PJlook-inside-v2,TopRight,1,0_SH20_BO1,204,203,200_  51VguvGxjdL._SY344_PJlook-inside-v2,TopRight,1,0_SH20_BO1,204,203,200_

A friend of mine told me about this book and I literally just finished reading it last night.  I loved Blair Singers message and it seems to be a pretty simple concept.  I thoroughly enjoyed how he writes,  it felt like I was having a conversation with him throughout the entire book.   He has a gift of making things very clear and he focuses on helping you stop listening to all the little voices in your head (aka other peoples opinions or long held beliefs).  This book helps you to see the importance of not worrying about what other people think, to become more self aware and it also helps you get on a path of fulfillment in your life.  I absolutely loved reading this book!!

self mastery and improvement books

I have listened to and read this book over and over and over and over and over again...once again, it's a little deep, but oh so powerful.  It really is a self help book that changed my life.  spiritual healing and self help books

When I began my quest of Spiritual Enlightenment, this is the first self improvement book I read.  Eckhart Tolle is a miraculous person and I wish I could live like him all the time.  He helps you to live your life in the NOW, and that time is just an illusion.  Yet, there is so much more to it.  I put this on my iPod and every night before I would go to bed, I would listen to him speak.  His voice is so calming and he just makes so much sense to me. 

best books for self improvement

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Hope for the Homeless – Ways you can help the homeless people in our community

Written by Lyndi. Posted in About Me, Hope for the Homeless Charity, Let's Give Back

help for the homeless people in our community

The past few years my life has been a wee bit fragile with a variety of complicated things happening.  Although to some my life may seem chaotic, I am actually feeling very peaceful.  I've learned that instead of worrying, stressing or being sad, it is better to force myself to do something nice for someone.  This takes my focus off of me and my problems.  It lifts someone up and in turn lifts my spirits and makes me happy. 

I have always had a sweet spot in my heart for homeless people.  My heart aches for their situation and I want to help them.  I especially want to help the children who are homeless, along with the ones who are really struggling and not just those who are begging for money on the corner.  Recently, I was having one of those days where I was sad, thinking about all the negative things that are happening in my life.  I knew I needed to change my mindset, so I got in my car and drove.   There was a force behind me and I knew exactly where to drive to, and when I got there I knew why.  I saw an older couple walking together and they where clearly homeless.  I stopped, got out of my car, asked them how they were, gave them some money and told them that God loves them.  They both started crying...the women hugged me and wouldn't let go.   I was in tears as they told me their story of how they became homeless.  They were sincere and very grateful for the money.  As I left them, I wished so much that I could do more...just giving money wasn't enough for me.  I had the deepest desire to help change their lives.

I drove home in my nice car, walked into my beautiful house, kissed my kids clean cheeks and went into my pantry with a million different options for dinner and life seemed grand.  I am so blessed.  So incredibly blessed.

The statistics below were so surprising to me.  I never thought that we had that many homeless people in our community, especially children.  I have been working on starting a charity called Hope for the Homeless of St George.  With this, I want to help homeless people get on their feet and to truly make a difference in their lives.  I have several plans for this venture, but starting something like this will take some time, donations and a lot of effort.  So, look for more details to come on this project.

 

Good news, because there is something we can do now to help the homeless people of St George!  I am super excited to be involved with this and I hope you will too!!

Here's the info:

MAKE THE HOMELESS SMILE!

hope for the homeless image

Planet 94.1 and United Way Dixie want to do our part to ‘Make the Homeless Smile.’  We were inspired by a viral video to organize something to help our community.  What you may not know is the amount of homeless that we have right here in Southern Utah.  We do, and we want to share those numbers with you.  We also want to encourage you to help make a difference.

  • 2013 Annualized Homeless Estimate—1173

  • 2013 Homeless School Children in Washington County—973

  • Children living in motels, shelters, or places not meant for habitation—117

  • Temporary housing situations—341

On Friday, November 8 from 6 a.m. to 7 p.m. we will be hosting an all day event to collect donations of specific items to make the homeless smile.  We will certainly be looking for necessity items, but we also want to include fun things as well.  Our goal is to make 1,000 bags to give to the homeless that include: a wallet with a $5 bill in it as well as a complete list of services that they might need, toothpaste and toothbrush, candy, a deck of playing cards, Soduku books or crossword puzzles, Bibles, and drawings or pictures from classes or families.

Red Robin will be providing lunch from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. for a $5 donation that will go straight to making the homeless people in our community smile.

This event will take place in the parking lot of the Ence Towers, located at 619 S. Bluff St. (Just North of Arby’s).  We will be collecting from 6 a.m. to 7 p.m. on Friday, November 8, 2013.

We will be documenting this event from the donation collection, to the bag stuffing, and finally the handing out of the bags to our homeless.  Our goal is to make a quick video and then send it to the guys who inspired the viral video in the first place.

List of items we are collecting for the bags (Goal 1,000 Bags)

  • Hard candy
  • Decks of playing cards
  • Puzzle Books (Sudoku, Crossword)
  • Wallets
  • $5 bills
  • Bibles
  • Toothpaste & toothbrush
  • Pictures or letters of encouragement for the bags (Thanksgiving cards)

Necessities that we will also be collecting

  • Coats
  • Blankets
  • Sleeping bags
  • Small bottles of shampoo
  • Deodorant
  • Can openers
  • Underwear
  • Shoes & socks
  • Personal care items
  • Reusable water bottles
  • Reusable Tupperware/meal boxes
  • Sunscreen
  • Backpacks
  • Notebooks/paper &  pens/pencils

 

Check out this amazing video!!

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Getting a little personal…

Written by Lyndi. Posted in About Me, Health & Wellness, Kids & Family Life, Life Coaching

I had a lady once tell me that she didn't think it was fair that my life was so easy, with the perfect little family and no problems.  She said this to me in a very mean, disrespectful way and all I wanted to do was roll my eyes and punch her in the face... but instead my eyes filled up with tears.  Before reacting to her,  I thought to myself that if she had any idea of the struggles that I've faced throughout my life, she would never of said that to me.  Instead, she would probably hug me, bring me dinner, fold all my laundry, rub my feet and watch my kids for a week :) .  I held back from punching her and I just smiled and said "my life isn't even close to perfect", and then changed the subject.

Although I feel incredibly blessed with the life I have been given, I could write a very long list about all the things that have gone wrong.  I could talk about these things for days and months and I'm sure I would get some sweet sympathy out of it.  Of course I would never do that because I know that negativity and complaining only brings out more sadness and more problems.  I have worked so hard to get to where I am today.  It's been a tough road, but now I can say that I have gotten past my insecurities, have let things go from my past and have deleted the desire to please others when it's not in my best interest.  I have forgiven people who have done me wrong and I've gotten to a place where I can listen to my inner voice and be guided by it on a daily basis.  I decided a few years ago that I wanted an extremely fulfilling life and mediocrity was not acceptable.  I wanted to be a positive, happy, successful, kind and loving person no matter what came along.  It's a challenge to live this way at times, but I find life so rewarding because of it.  I definitely fail over and over again, but I never think of myself as a failure.  I am very patient with myself and I try to learn and grow from each negative or positive experience that comes my way.  So today I've decided to blog about staying positive, even when things get tough and you feel there is no hope.

Through all of my trials, I have learned a thing or two or three or four...these are crucial in finding happiness and joy within yourself.

1.  Never and yes I mean NEVER say anything bad about yourself.   I don't care if it's true or not,  but do not do it!  Not even if you are joking or being sarcastic, because your body doesn't know the difference.  I promise this will change your mood, your day and your life.  You will find this very difficult at first, but just try to notice all the times that you would say something negative about yourself and stop yourself before it comes out of your beautiful mouth! I believe that if you tell yourself you are fat, then you will be.  If you tell yourself that you are a bad mom, then you will be.  If you tell yourself that you are freaking awesome then YOU WILL BE!  This is where number two comes in...

2.  I AM statements.  This is when you tell yourself "I AM happy", "I AM healthy", "I AM motivated", "I AM patient", "I AM a great runner (one I've been working on)".  Even if these aren't true, (most of mine aren't true at the time) still say them and repeat them a few times a day.  Anything that you want to do or become, say it in this order I AM...and fill in the blank.  What happens is your brain tells your body what to do, and you tell your brain what to do.  I know it sounds a little cooky, but it works!!  I do this every single day, especially before bed because if you say your I AM statements right before you are about to go to sleep, then it stays in your subconscious the entire night and therefore comes to reality much quicker.   I use this tool with my kids on a daily basis too...if they are being mean to their sibling, or if they have a bad attitude, I make them repeat after me and I tell them what to say.  For example, "I AM nice to my brother", "I AM smart", or "I AM amazing at cleaning my room".  It changes their attitude almost every single time.  Also, you can never say I AM NOT something...it can only be a positive sentence. 

3.  Take a complement!!!  When someone says "you look so nice today", you say "awww...thanks so much" or "that's nice of you to say" even if you don't feel like you look nice...It will feel awkward at first to talk this way, but you'll get used to it.   Never, never, NEVER say "No I don't...This outfit is old, my hair is dirty and I ran out of my good makeup so you can see all my ugly wrinkles, I feel fat in these clothes, and look how giant this zit is on my cheek and oh my heck look at my nails...and don't even get me started on how messy my house is!!"  We are all guilty of doing this, but the end result is sadness.  Please just LOVE yourself.  I promise this will trickle down into all aspects of your life and it WILL make you a happier person. 

4.  My mom would always say, "there is only one rule and that is Be Kind"...it seems like everything important falls under that category.  Even if it seems like someone has the perfect, ideal life...they don't.  EVERYONE is struggling with something and you never know what kind of chaos is happening around them...so be kind and patient to anyone you come in contact with.  Keep this in mind when you are driving and someone cuts you off, in the check out line behind the lady with 100 coupons, when you see someone who looks scary, or someone who is drop dead gorgeous (yes, they have feelings too), to your neighbors and definitely to all of your loved ones (which sometimes seems to be the hardest).   A smile and a simple hello is all someone might need to make their day drastically better.  When you live your life this way the kindness will circle back around to you and you will have blessings beyond your comprehension. 

blog about staying positive in darkness

I was feeling a little down as I drove home from the gym this morning, but not really sure why.  Was it because of the insane ass kicking that I had just received in my favorite boot camp class??...or from lack of sleep, or just the fact that life seems to be so hard lately.   At the same time of feeling lost and ready to give up, I looked up into the sky and saw the most beautiful dark clouds with a glorious light shining through them.  I quickly grabbed my phone and snapped this picture.  I instantly felt my Heavenly Fathers overwhelming love for me and the thought came to me, When darkness surrounds you, be the light that shines through it...for all of the world to see.  I want to be that light.  I hope to be that light.  I AM that light. 

I wish for happiness, peace and love in each of your lives.

Love, Lyndi

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11 Characteristics of a True Friend!

Written by Lyndi. Posted in About Me, Health & Wellness, Life Coaching

characteristics of a true friend

I have been blessed with countless amazing friendships in my life...I cherish my friends and I love them all so much.  To me, the characteristics of a true friend is someone who will stand by you, no matter what. Someone you can trust with your deepest secrets.  Someone who will bring you dinner and take your kids, even when you say no...just because they know that you need it. Someone that makes you feel happy when you are around them.  Someone who doesn't compete with you, but is happy for you when good things happen in your life.  Someone who will have your back and stand up for you.  Someone who doesn't get offended or jealous if you spend time with someone else. Someone who truly wants what is best for you, even if it is not best for them.  Someone who cheers you on in your life!

These are two of my very best friends and I absolutely LOVE them!  They are always there to help me out when I need it and they make me laugh so hard that I pee my pants!  They make my life fun and all around better!  I couldn't live life without you girls!!

how to be a good friend

I think the first thing that we must do to gain a true friend is to be one ourselves!  Here is a great list of 11 characteristics that can help us become a better friend. 

1. Accepts you as you are: A true friend is someone who does not try to be somebody that she is not and accepts you as you are. They are also patient with you when you make mistakes and forgive you easily. 

2. Is Dependable: A true friend is dependable and you can trust your friend with your secrets and know that he would not let a third person know about it. They stick with you in good times and bad. 

3. Is Honest: A true friend would be honest and loyal with you. She does not break the promises that she made to you. She makes you feel safe and secure with her. 

4. Listens to you: A true friend always listens to you and cares about your needs and emotions. A true friend would be there always when you need to talk. When you have news to share or grievances, she will give you her full attention.

5. Would be there for you: A true friend would be there with you through thick and thin. Good friends don’t call up people only to request a favor. But would be the first person to come to your aid in time of crisis.  

6. Gives you Space: A true friend respects your privacy. They understand that you have family, other friends and colleagues who are part of your life too and do not cling to you always. A true freind builds trust and confidence with you, which makes you comfortable enough to share your good and bad times. 

7.  Always keep in touch: True friends don’t wait for you to call them. They always makes an effort to keep in touch with you even if it is through a quick phone call or an email. They know what's going on in your life and is interested about it.  A good friend makes it clear that they care about you. 

8. Do not gossip about you: A true friend does not gossip about you or talk behind your back. A true friend is a person you can trust and won't say anything about you or try to damage your reputation. They will let you know when they're concerned and do their best to stick up for you when you're in trouble. A good friend will also apologizes when she does something wrong. She does not hold grudges. 

9. Would be Happy for you: A true friend never gets jealous on your success but would be happy for you. She celebrates your success as her success.  A good friend will likely know how to lift your spirits and make your day.

10. Would be Supportive: A true friend is supportive of you and your goals.  She will know what makes you tick and help you become the person you want to be. They won't try to change who you are or drag you into situations that make you uncomfortable. 

11. Is Giving: True friends give more than what is asked. When they see a need they respond without expecting anything in return and without anyone knowing about it. True friends are generous with their time, money, possessions and knowledge. Best of all they have a generous spirit.

I feel so incredibly lucky to have the friends that I have...you know who you are and you know that I love you and am so grateful to have you in my life!  Peace, Love & Rock and Roll to all of my friends out there!

Related Articles:

best-self-improvement-booksstop-doing-to-yourselfrules-for-happiness
A few of my favorite Self Improvement books…30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself! Best List EVER!10 Rules for ULTIMATE happiness

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10 Rules for ULTIMATE happiness

Written by Lyndi. Posted in About Me, Free Printables, Graphic Design, Health & Wellness, Life Coaching

I have experienced several challenges this past year, but in the end I have grown and become a much stronger person because of them.  I feel peace, have great determination and a sense of confidence in my unknown future.  I am very excited about 2014!!

I am beginning this new year with a renewed sense of what is truly important in life.  I try to live my life very simply.  I definitely make mistakes on a daily basis, but these 10 rules are what I base my life upon...and when I do, I feel complete contentment.

I wish love and happiness in each of your lives this new year and I know that if  you can follow these 10 rules, EVERYTHING else in your life will fall into place.  HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Love, Lyndi

Download for free below

*UPDATED* I need to clarify my reasoning for number five on my list.  When I say "Give Guilt the Bird", I mean you shouldn't let other people's ideas and opinions determine how you live your life.  Make choices based on what you feel is right and what is good for YOU!  Don't worry about what others think and don't let them have control over your life.  There is definitely a time and a place to feel regret and guilt when you have done something wrong...but when this happens, don't be hard on yourself.  It is the perfect learning opportunity to know that you should change that behavior so you don't feel that way again. 

10rules

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How to get the perfect soft curls, plus my FAVORITE hair products!

Written by Lyndi. Posted in About Me, How to...

Being an interior designer, it's funny to me that a lot of my emails and comments that I get from my followers are questions about mine or my kids appearance.  These questions range from our hair, clothes, skin care, my gym routines, to what we eat on a daily basis.  I am definitely not an expert in any of these fields, so that's why it makes me laugh to answer some of these questions.  I have had several requests to do a blog post about my hair and I have recently found some amazing products, so I thought I'd share them with you. 

Check out Madison's hair when it air dries...can you say crazy lion afro? This girls hair is thick, coarse and naturally curly.  She has a beautiful color and ever since she was a baby people have asked me if I dye her hair.  She gets compliments on it all the time, but her hair is usually in a braid or a messy bun because it's so hard to tame.  Until now!! I have tried a variety of flat irons and none of them can even compare to the Sam Villa Sleekr.  It took her hair from crazy to sleek within minutes.  Check out her before and after pictures...unbelievable! beforeafter

Then there was me...my hair is naturally thick, coarse, and a bit frizzy.   With these certain hair products and tools, I can get my hair soft and healthy looking.  IMG_5297photo456 IMG_5337IMG_5340IMG_5341Let's talk products

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 1.  Redken Smooth Lock: I put this in my hair before I flat iron or curl it and it keeps it nice and smooth...or, put it on the flyaways after styling.

2.  Palmers Coconut Oil Formula:  This is one of my all time favorite styling products and it is inexpensive and you can buy it at Target.  I put a small amount on each section of my hair before I curl or flat iron it.  It keeps my hair smooth and frizz free. 

3.  Redken Hairspray #12: I use this when I am done styling to give my hair the finished look...smells great too!

4.  Redken Powder Refresher: This is key...especially if you sweat on a daily basis, or if your hair gets oily.  I try to go 5 days without washing my hair (it's so healthy for your hair to do this) and this helps keep my hair looking fresh and clean.

5.  Heat Protectant:  Make sure you use a heat protectant spray before you use a flat iron or curling iron.  This will protect your hair from becoming damaged.  This Matrix brand is the one I am currently using, but there are several great ones out there. 

6.  Hot Tools Ceramic Curling Iron: I use 1 1/2 inch rod and I curl it in large sections to give it that relaxed, soft look.  Here's a great tutorial on exactly how I curl my hair with a curling iron, from my friends blog The Girl in the Yellow Dress.

7.  Sam Villa Sleekr Flat Iron:  This is the best tool I've ever owned.  I use this to do my hair straight, soft sexy curls, beachy waves, or tight curls.  I absolutely love it.  Here's a tutorial to learn how to use a flat iron to make curls.

If you want to purchase the Sam Villa Sleekr, I have a 20% off code for all of my readers.  Use EBDC in the coupon code box when checking out. 

I bought the Redken products and curling iron from Ulta.

*UPDATED*

Here is my routine on when I use these products:

Day one: wash hair, heat protectant, smooth lock (just a small amount), blow dry, section hair and apply a small amount of the coconut hair milk to each section right before you curl or flat iron it.  It depends on the day if I use the hair spray because it will add more hold, and somedays I want a more relaxed look.

Day two-five: Use the powder refresher the day your hair starts to look or feel greasy. It will pull the grease out and give it volume instantly.  I spray it on and blow dry it through for a minute. Some people can keep the same curls from the day before, but I usually need to go through mine quickly again. When I do, I apply a small amount of the coconut hair milk to keep it looking tame. After I am done curling it, I will wait for all the heat to get out of my hair and I will pull my fingers through it to make the curls separated. I will add some oil shine or the Redken smooth lock to calm any flyaways. It usually only takes me ten minutes to do my hair on the days I don't wash it.

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Letters To My Lovelies…

Written by Lyndi. Posted in About Me, Free Printables, Graphic Design, Kids & Family Life, Parenting Tips

I have kept a notebook in my drawer that I named "Funny Things My Kids Say".  My girls have their fair share of funny sayings, but this book is mostly full of Max"isms".  He started talking full sentences at 12 months and since then all he talks about are body parts, swear words, telling jokes or asking questions that are so funny, but very inappropriate.  I have absolutely loved looking back at this notebook because I forget so easily all the sweet and funny things that my kids say.

One of my favorite quotes was when Max was barely three, a kid asked him "Why are you black, Max?", and he said without hesitation, "I'm not black, I am brown...why don't you know your colors yet?" He is so clever and witty and he keeps me laughing my ass off! I know that when my kids are all grown up this will be a precious book to look and laugh at.  

Last week I was asked to write a letter to my 12 year old daughter by her church leaders.  I was supposed to write about what my hope was for her future.  I wrote this letter and it made me cry.  It made me realize that I need to put these words down on paper A LOT more.  I've always been encouraged to write in my journal but at this stage in my life I think it is even more important to write to my kids so they can remember their childhood.  Also, if something were to happen to me I would want my kids to have letters from me, to remember how I felt about them, the love I had for them, my words of encouragement and my hope for their lives.  

With some hesitation, I decided to attach a copy of the letter that I wrote to Madison.  I hope it will inspire you to write something like it for your sweet ones.  I know these letters will one day be cherished, so I decided that every Sunday I would write one letter to one of my kids or to another loved one...i will put it in a file box so it will be kept safe, or if they are old enough I will give it to them.

I'm very excited to do this and I hope you will join me in this endeavor!  I have created several labels in a variety of colors to customize a notebook or file box for your specific situation.

Microsoft Word - My Dear Sweet Madsy.docx

I got this great patterned file box, binder and notebooks all from Target...all you need to do is print out your label of choice (5x7 or 4x6), cut it out and put it on.  It it easy, cheap and cute!!

To save the label of your choice,  just right click on the image and hit "save as" and save it to your computer.
filebox lettersletters1letters-gray-turqletters-yellow-blue loveyou letters-babyblue letters-baby pink letters-mustard letters-blue letters-pink  letters-yellow

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