I am the lucky mom of four kids...they all didn't come easily into this world, so I am extra grateful to have them be a part of my family (more on that story to come)! I want to be the best mom possible to them...and I think the most important thing I can teach them is how valuable and truly special they are...so, how do I do that?!?
Children do not need to be fussed over and overpraised for doing simple things that should be done every day, or told they are geniuses for putting a sippy cup in the sink. Children do, however, need to be encouraged—daily.
Everyday they need:
a hug and a kiss
and they need to hear these things...yes, every...single...day!
I love you
I'm so lucky that you are my child
I'm proud of you
I believe in you
I trust you
& they need encouragement
They need to feel that they are important to you. The best way to do this is through complimenting them.
- Make your compliments meaningful. Don't just compliment your kids for doing what's expected of them, or for something minor. Compliments should be reserved for actual accomplishments! Don't pour on the praise for something they didn't actually do. And never say they are the Best in the World in anything. I'm sure that your child is going to do MANY wonderful things today; the key is to look for the right opportunity to praise them.
- Praise them appropriately. When your kids do something special, like draw you a picture or get dressed by themselves, that's when you can tell that you're proud of them. Rewarding your children reinforces good behavior, but they are validated simply by knowing that they've pleased you.
- Slip them a note. If your children can read or are in school, tuck a note in their backpack or lunchbox and let them know how you feel about them. A little acknowledgment can go a long way.
- Notice their good deeds. Whenever you see your child being nice or doing anything positive, tell them that you noticed it and how proud you are of them.
If you do these things everyday, I guarantee that you will see a major shift in your child's self confidence...which boils over into every single aspect of their lives!! Happy Complimenting!
Information Adapted from parentsconnect.com